Post Performance Bliss

On Sunday, October 26th, I had my first paid performance. It was at Journeys, a spiritual community at which my partner Tim plays music each Sunday. I was quite nervous going into the service and was not performing until the end. The community at Journeys is a group of wonderful, open-minded individuals who embraced our family from the first time Tim played there. I knew they would be receptive to my dance, so my anxiety was not so much about that, but more about not wanting to "let them down", or let myself down.

When I hoop, sometimes I'm just practicing, putting the pieces together...trying to learn new things. This type of hooping happens most often when I am able to attend Baxter's classes and in short spurts in the living room or at hoop jams. Mostly though, when I have the opportunity to hoop, I use it to express my inner most self. I tend to "loose" myself in the hoop. It feels almost like there is no separation between my hoop and myself. We are dancing as partners, but at times, perhaps for long periods of time, we become one dancer. It is at these moments that I feel what many hoopers call "Hoop Bliss". I feel like my true self at that moment and this was what I wanted to convey to my audience on Sunday.

I was not performing until the last song. Bill, the minister at Journeys, wanted to wait until the end so that the children could come in at that time and see me hoop as well. It made sense, but left me with a pit of nervousness in my stomach throughout the service. It felt reminiscent to my days in high school and college before a race at a swim meet. Finally, it was my time to perform. I said a few words about the hoop being a sacred circle to me and my gratitude to the Journeys community for all their love and support of our family. And I offered my dance in gratitude for this community of beautiful souls. As I got on stage, Tim and the band began playing "Into the Mystic" and my hoop and I began our dance. My nerves faded immediately and I only thought about the gratitude and love I felt for this community. I tried to express this in my dance. I wanted them to feel it through me. As the song ended and I finished, I was not quite sure what to do. Bill came up immediately and the members of Journeys applauded and then began to stand. I was overcome with humility. It was hard to lift my head, but when I did I could see that a number of people were crying. I felt even more gratitude and humbled that they would offer such thanks to me.

I am so honored that my first performance went so well. Talking with people after the service and hearing their reactions to my dance, and the band's song really was special. Knowing that they "got it", understood my message and appreciated it. I hooped from my heart and my message was heard. There is nothing more blissful than that.